WRONG. I find this distinction easy now but it’s been a long time coming and I spent all my twenties and the first half of my thirties looking outside of me for reasons to feel happy and satisfied with my life. the problem is the only moment you really have is NOW and the only thing you can really control is how you feel and react to life’s circumstances. It’s very difficult to allow yourself to enjoy your life when you’re always striving.

Having kids taught me this because my son lives 100% in the moment and when he wants things he accepts he’s going to get them. He hasn’t learned otherwise yet. Does that mean he obsesses over that object and refuses to be happy and content with today? No, he knows they’re not mutually exclusive. Somewhere in childhood we forget this.

I think you can only reach your greatest heights as a being if you let life evolve. You can still know what you want, but you have the faith that it’s coming and you are still allowed to be happy with what you have today.

I stumbled and dugg this. Good job.

Kelly

Acceptance doesn’t mean you’re being complacent (I thought it was one in the same so I looked forward to reading this piece!)
Accepting things as is and being very present in every moment can actually HELP you
If you’re anything like me, you’re so fixated on the future and how you might mess it up that you can’t really be present.. your resistant to things that can actually be dealt with if you just accept what it is – as it is.

I feel much more productive with this mindset because I am not spending all of my time on what it SHOULD be anymore. Rather, I see what is and I work on producing the best that I can with what is.. and an accumulation of that leads a much more fulfilled life

And I love what you say about identity
Situations are forever changing – you can find steady footing in your strong values and the more I understand that, the steadier I feel
which is awesome because as a twenty-something rubbing her eyes at the new light of adulthood, one can really feel very unstable and unsure of herself

Needless to say but I’ll say it anyway
Jonathan, this is an excellent article!

I go through several episodes of trying to clarify my thinking too. So I can definitely understand how important this process is important to anyone on the path to clarity.

My view is this: there is no point denying what is innate in us i.e. the desire to constantly improve oneself or life’s situation. It is a natural instinct. It is natural for our consciousness to desire for growth, whether it is seen in love, relationships, health, money or spirituality. We do not deny our desire to want to grow but it is the choice of what to grow which is important. Some of us will choose to grow wealth at the expense of other aspects of life. Yet others, like you and I, strive for balance because it is in balance, that we can be at our highest potential.

So I “accept” that I need to grow, as part of human divinity. I am inclined not to accept situations as what they are since it would mean that I would be powerless to do anything. Rather, I hope to SEE life for what it is and in that seeing for its true nature, come to great understanding. Greater understanding connects back to the spiritual growth that I (and you as well) seek.

I agree with what you said about choosing the values that we want to be aligned to, even in our desire for balance. There is that choice of which values are more important. When we are guided by some priorities, life’s decisions are so much easier to make.

Thanks for sharing, Jonathan. It is a very thought-provoking post.

Love and light,
Evelyn